Don Does Research

INTERIOR: Smoky bar. Very smoky. So smoky you wouldn't believe.
Sounds of clinking drinks and coughing. Lots of coughing. Zoom in on
Don Curtainer. He is smoking five cigarettes and making notes on the
back of a match book. Close up of match book reveals that he has
written "cough, cough, cough, hack and cough"
He looks up thoughtfully from his matchbook, rubs his chin with his
thumbnail and lights another cigarette. An elderly black man in a
bartender's uniform is clearing his table.

Don: Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you are a negro.

Black man nods. Enter hotel manager.

Manager: Is this darky bothering you, sir? (To black man) Toby, have
you been bothering the white man?

Black man: I ain't done shit!

Don: It's all right. I was just talking with him. But you can get me another drink -- scotch and rum with a grain alcohol chaser. Better make it a double -- I've got a long drive out of the city ahead of me.

Manager (servilely) Right away, Sir!

Exit

Black man: (Under his breath) Stupid mother....

Don: So, my good negro fellow, do you smoke?

Black man: Who said so? Who tole you dat?

Don: (shocked) A non-smoker! Fascinating! I have heard tell of such beings, but never knew they actually existed.

Black Man: Oh, you mean cigarettes. Yessir, I smokes cigarettes.
(shows pack)
Jigaboo. I was in the war and the army used to give a carton to us every week. I loves my Jigaboos. Wouldn't smoke nothing else.

(Attractive cocktail waitress passes by)

Don: Excuse me, but I have to go cheat on my wife. Don't go away, I'll be right back.

Black Man: I understand. I'm a married man myself, I am.
(Don leaves and black man lights up a cigarette, takes a long satisfying drag, looks at it and then
the camera.)
Black Man: Jigaboo cigarettes. You don't have to be a negro to smoke them... but it helps. (exit)
(Enter waiter who puts Don's drink on the table. Before he turns towards the camera, we

Fade out)